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Negotiating During a High Conflict Divorce in North Carolina

High conflict divorces occur when both parties are unwilling to agree on certain aspects of their divorce. While it might seem like negotiation is useless in this scenario, even the most combative spouses in Monroe can reach favorable compromises with the correct approach. Even if you feel like there is no point in trying to negotiate with your stubborn, emotional former spouse, it is important to at least try. A successful negotiation leads to a divorce settlement agreement, which is almost always a favorable alternative to a drawn-out battle in the courtroom.

If you are approaching a high conflict divorce in Union County, your first step should be to enlist the help of an experienced divorce attorney. Our legal professionals can give you a real advantage at the negotiating table, and you can approach the situation with a greater degree of confidence. A skilled and knowledgeable divorce lawyer has an extensive knowledge of the various facts and laws at play during a divorce, and they can advise you on the right course of action. These experts can also employ tactics that you might not have considered previously.

Emotions Only Hinder Negotiations

The first thing you need to understand about divorce negotiations is that an emotional approach is never effective. This is problematic for many spouses, because divorces are naturally emotional. While you might be dealing with all kinds of feelings and inner conflicts at this time, it makes sense to push these aside and deal only with the facts when you are negotiating with your spouse. Angry outbursts, insults, and unreasonable demands will only hinder your negotiation. Instead, try to approach this situation with a more calm, efficient, and calculating mindset.

Negotiations are Won With Data

Always focus on the data when approaching divorce negotiations. If you have a greater understanding of the facts compared to your spouse, you will have a significant advantage. For example, you might discover that certain financial assets are worth much less or much more than you originally thought. This information will obviously impact the way you prioritize certain assets.

It makes sense to gather as much information as you can before you ever set foot in the negotiation room. You can do this on your own to some extent, but you might also want to get help from experts. On the financial side of things, accountants and similar professionals may be able to give you important advice. Your divorce attorney can also help you understand the specific legal implications of your negotiation. All of this will help tremendously as you negotiate with your former spouse.

The Importance of Developing a Strategy

Along with collecting information, you should also take the time to develop an effective negotiating strategy beforehand. A clear, well-defined strategy can help you achieve your goals in a more efficient manner compared to simply “winging it.” The most important part of a negotiation is the planning stage, and this happens before anyone sits down and starts making demands. Here is what you should consider when developing your strategy:

  • Define Your Goals: Think carefully about what you wish to achieve in your negotiation. Set clear goals. What do you want more than anything else? Child custody? Possession of the family home? Control of your business? Prioritize these goals, putting your most important outcomes at the top of the list.
  • Consider Your Spouse: Skilled negotiators understand that it is not all about them. In order to approach this situation in the most efficient way possible, you must consider the goals and motives of your former spouse. How are they approaching the negotiation? What is most important to them? What are they willing to do to achieve these goals, and what emotions are driving these goals? These are all important questions you need to ask yourself before the negotiation takes place.
  • Set Limits: It is always a good idea to be willing to compromise, but you must also set limits. Speak with your attorney and let them know when you will both stand up and walk away. Settling these limits beforehand reduces the chances of you being convinced to do something you are not comfortable with.
Reach Out to a Qualified Divorce Attorney Today

If you want to approach your high conflict divorce in the most efficient way possible, it makes sense to find the most qualified, experienced divorce attorney in your county. Reach out to Arnold & Smith, PLLC at your earliest convenience, and we can start building a solid negotiation strategy together. Even the most stubborn spouses can be swayed with the right leverage.